Trying to get pregnant sucks. I want you to know that. I want you to know I've been trying for a year and I find it infuriating and frustrating that I'm not pregnant.
I lost my first baby, I should get a free pass on this because I've been through enough. But I don't and I find it incredibly annoying. I hate this. Are you listening world?! I.FUCKING.HATE.THIS!! It's bullshit. I'm mad and frustrated and if another person tells me to relax, I might throat punch him.
I am doing everything I am supposed to do. I've lost over 10 lbs, I'm eating healthy, I exercise, and I take my prenatal. The husband is healthy so I don't get it. I just don't get it.
I'm going to be a kick ass mom to a living baby because I'm already a kick ass mom to my dead one. Genevieve made me a better person and I love her for it every day. I wish it turned out differently, but I can't change that and now I am ready for a new little life to love, cherish, and teach.
I am so ready. I'm so ready I'm annoyed. Trying to get pregnant is the perfect trifecta of helplessness. First you wait to ovulate, then you wait the two week wait until you test to see if you're pregnant, and then if it is negative you wait for your period to show. Then it cycles. It's been cycling for a year now. So what the hell body? What the hell universe? What the hell god? It only took 4 months to get pregnant the first time.
I am ready to be knocked up. Please do this in a timely fashion. Thank you.
Sincerely,
The willing participant who wants to be nauseous, moody, have back and rib pain, and all other terrible pregnancy symptoms to take home a happy and healthy baby
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